; i need youu

Saturday, July 29, 2006

wahahaha..2day watched lake house...!! haha..nice story..! its touchin n all..but hor e story line a bit weird nar..a bit unrealistic..lol..for tt i'll give hmm..3.5stars/5stars. yeapyeap. but was touchin n all..i teared sia..its been long time since i teared for a show..lol..keane reeves is handsome sia..lol..though juz now i say okok la..haha..but in tt show he handsome nar..!! omg.. *sry dun noe how spell his name..lol*

mornin overslpt sia..suppose meet them 10..den 9.15 leave house..but late a bit nia..lucky..lol..ran for bus..den met cher lilian..sia la..she came so early..i so shocked..lol..but oh well hehe..den aft tt went up e bus *she ask me faster go* lol..den study till abt 2+ met baby.. got study la..though 2 others sure not a lot..but not bad le..is not how much i studied..is how much i understood..lol..i've learn 2 chap? but need 2 prac some more..lol..2nite muz study le nar.. past 2nites lz..den slp..last nite mario n online. sianx..muz study 2nite le..lol

baby late sia..haix..suppose go town de..lol..but end up go cwp..yeapyeap..wanted ask him go yishun cos i lz travel..but rain so heavy no shelter 2 e theather..lol..so go there lo..yeap..at 1st not veri happy wif him nar..den always suan him..haha..he oso got suan me nar. but well..haha..but i had fun nar..i miss him..mayb i missed him 2much make me sad ba..yeap i love him..though i have my doubts sometimes..lol..

baby..no matter wat..i'll b by ur side..i hope u will too. muacks..!!

thinking of you @ 10:25 PM

Friday, July 28, 2006

2day meet ah yen..lol..though got some awkward moments like both dun noe wat 2 talk..but den was still fun sia..lol..still chat a lot..yeapyeap..hehe..happy sia..wed can meet her again..lol.. though we not as close as e past. its ok. im glad we are still frdx..n there are still times when u pei wo when i was fan. hope you'll give me e chance 2 share ur probs oso. yeap yeap.. den we'll b e best darlings forever..lol.

i tink there's sth wrong wif me recently. i seem numb. haix.. i dun noe how 2 explain. but well.. shall tink aft my exam..haven reali started revision sia.haix. onli read here n there but when do work cannot do..!! omg. howhowhow sia.. haix. lata muz read finance le.. hope tml poh eng they all gg study sia. if not i reali die..yeap..

thinking of you @ 6:53 PM

Thursday, July 27, 2006

2day gone crazy lol..esp when break time..suppose 2 study de..haix..but den end up playin uno. lol..tml muz study ar..! tml got 5hr break sia..sianx..law push back e timing..sigh..!! den end later tml..but aft tt meetin baby ba..yeap..

poh eng n her wei xiang..! lol..i like him oso leh..but hor i not as crazy a fan as her.. lol.. but he shuai la..hehe..i like his voice oso..!! haha..yeap yeap..hope she tml dun start her wei xiang ting again wor..lol..

tml meetin ah yen for lunch..!! lol..den next wed gg back sjc..!! haha..wah so long nv go back liao..sure go there veri huan nian e times there..lol..actually now already miss my life there..lol..but im still happy wif my life now la..except certain tings..hehe..excited 2 go back sia.. lol..wonder how are e chers..lol..den aft tt ah yen dar go back sch..i shld b go hm ba..lol..mayb mon go find hwee study..see how ba..hehe..yeap..

juz now baby suddenly sms me sia..lol..happy..though chat awhile nia la..but its ok..i happy le..hehe..cos he find me ma..not i find him 1st..lol..aiya..i muz b crazy la..oh well..i tot i hated him..*mostly out of anger den tink tt way* hmm..but i guess terence was rite..i love him 2 much le..den i felt hurt n all..n expected him do sth but he nv den i more sad..lol..but guess swhen u love some1..u reali need 2 accept him..i can onli guide him tt much ba..e rest is up 2 him 2 tink for himself le.. but i noe he slowly tryin ba.. muacks..!! i love u baby..! no matter wat i say..do..or react..its mostly cos i care for u.. n i noe sometimes i veri unreasonable..but i'll try 2 change oso..muacks..

suddenly the world seems such a perfect
place suddenly it moves with such a
perfect grace suddenly my life doesn't seem
such a waste it all revolves around you
and there's no mountain too high no river
too wide sing out this song andi'll be there
by your side storm clouds may gather and stars
may collide but I love you until the end of time...

thinking of you @ 5:44 PM

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

mum got her job le..!! lol..congrats mum..hehe..tml start work..heard not bad oso.but have 2 see workin condition ba..dun wan my mum so stress le..yeap..hmm..now dun noe hols wanna work or enjoy not..cos last hols le..haha..aft tt is grad liao..we shall see..lol..*most prob slack..but veri borin leh..lol* hmm..mum's work is onli 6mths..aft tt hope she can cont sia..hope e girl cont her studies..lol..den my mum can work..!! haha..i mean hor..but oh well..6mths time shall see..hehe..

haven been feelin rite dis few days..tml is 1wk since i've been happy le..haix..if dis carry on my exam sure die..haha..so i muz make sure 2day got study le..yest end up onli read 3pts of law..lol..mayb tml go sch earlier 2 study ba..yeap..lol..

thinking of you @ 6:54 PM

Monday, July 17, 2006

wahaha..finally can update on my date on fri..lol..skipped e last lesson den went out wif baby.. met him at his house 1st..den ard 2+ left his house n went town..yeap..den go watch pirates of e carribean 2..dead man's chest. lol..nice sia..e effects all so cool..!! its linked 2 part 1..lol..e movie veri long leh..abt 2hr+ yeap yeap..

movie fin..some1 suddenly "jumped" on my shoulder..lol..got a shock sia..e person say "jie" oso..haha..den i look up, cant reali see e face cos still quite dark ma..lol..den realised was ah ling..!! lol..so qiao..!! haha..den say hi den bye..diao..lol..she go her shoppin .. den walkin at cine..saw beeting..!! wah..haha..so lucky day..see 2 frdx..lol..she watch pirates oso..but was e earlier show..haha..

aft tt baby wanna go pc bunk..i dam sian le nar..i noe he noe i sianx le..keep pei wo try 2 chat wif me n stuff..lol..but haix..dun noe..reach there i was super sianx..anyhow tink again..i feel tt we like 2 diff worlds but dun wanna admit..haix..dun noe? i believe we still love each other ba..so dun wanna 2 tink..lol.. i miss him

poh eng sick sia..get well soon..!! drink more water..yeap.. yest at aunt house bored oso..lookin thru my phone book 2 find ppl msg..den dun noe y suddenly got e urge 2 msg seth..but tink he shld b bz..haha..he didnt reply..till ard 10+ or 11+ say he sick so slpin whole day oso..lol..hope he get well soon oso ba..yeap..

tml got biz finance test..haix..gonna fail le ba..lol..cos dun reali understand some topics..lata go hm muz look at e last topic n e tuts. yeap..

i miss you..

thinking of you @ 10:27 AM

Thursday, July 13, 2006

wahahaha...2day go gym..!! lol..next thur gg play badminton..!! lol..excited hope can book dao e court..lol..if not go gym again lo..haha..most prob 10 of ur go..sia la..lol..like gg fightin like tt..lol.. wah aft went gym ate a lot sia..haix...feel so giulty now leh.. sobx..ate 1 banana..1 papaya..1 e pancake ting wif cheese..den reach hg pt buy sausage..!! omg..so fattening.. T.T i muz start my diet nar..realised i gain wt again..haix..need 2 start le..next wk see when free go downstairs running..sat mayb evening tt time go run..lol..2 gain stamina n lose wt..hope can lose ar..poh eng say now like harder 2 lose wt le.. T.T

now leg muscle aching like hell nar..lol.. hmm 2day got back biz acct paper.. as expected it sux..haix..tink i got lowest in class nar..dun tink any1 will get lower den me..haix.. got 19/30 sia juz pass nia..sigh..exam muz study dam hard le nar..everyting..!! except mayb law cos law i still okok ba..juz got prob rememberin e laws..lol..muz start practiseing n readin thru my notes le..if not die..haix..all my frdx so guai de..got do tut..sigh..muz start..!! lol..

i miss him sia..haix..wish we both can study 2gether..lol..but dun tink he got tt guai nar..sigh.. oh well see next wk he will pei wo study not..lol..sure wun de..cos he no tests comin..lol..okok la i oso dun study nar..lol..but at least test n exam i do study..!! haha..hope he oso will go n study ba..

okok..gtg pei wei yi play habz le..lata she sad..lol..

thinking of you @ 6:15 PM

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

daddy..!! are u ok?! plz dun sad sad..though i noe lata u come back u sure try 2 keep ur emo 2 urself or 2 mum nia..but ya..dun sad..!! T.T

haix..heard fr mum tt dad called back juz now he sounded sad..is it true? haix.. i noe he went for an interview dis mornin..for another position in the co "is it call co? dun noe..shall juz say co lol" but he went there all mostly poly grads..haix..den of cos younger den him lo..haix..i dun noe e news yet..but i tink if he got it he wld have called back again le..sigh..!! wat has e world become?! a chasin paper society..!! wat happen 2 e native world? all become so cruel n bleak. true my dad may not b as certificate-ly qualified..but so wat? he has been in dis line since he fin NS..!! hu can b as loyal as my dad le..true i mayb bias cos he is my dad..but i noe my dad put his 110% effort into his work de lo..mayb now he slack le cos he noes he is not appreciated in e co..haix..tt time he was so upset he even bang his hand on e wall n injured his hand sia..haix..my heart pain ar..!! hope he'll b ok soon..!!

daddy ar..i'll try 2 wisen up n b more brave n stop lyin..!! but you've got 2 give me more time ba..n confidence..but i need u both 2 noe 2tings..i love you n my family..!! though i've hurt n hurt u all again and again wif my lies..secondly..i wan 2 make my own decision..i noe you all will hurt again..but plz accept my choice can ma? i noe no parents wan their child 2 suffer but den..i noe wat i wan for now..i believe in fate n destiny..believe it wif me oso k?

haix..how come when daddy is sad i feel so sad oso?! but when mum quit her job i like no feeling? haix..i feel bad sia..reali..but i noe everytime sth happen i dun show i care though inside im sad n cryin for them..haix..wat e hell is wrong wif me?! m i human?! aiyo..i muz b reali fr IMH..oh well..reali hope mum will get a job soon..but a beta n more relaxin job..most prob hols i'll go earn my own income..i noe i've been sayin dis since forever but haix..

dad's hm..!! i dun dare look at him sia..im lame i noe..oh well..hmm..reali hope both of them are happy..im reali a bad daughter man..haix..i dun even ask them how is their day..!! im dyin 2 go over n hug both of them n break down n say sry tt they have such a bad n unfilial daughter..!! hu always show attitude..

tml baby mayb meetin maple frdx 2 play lan at ps..there's dis girl most prob gg oso..dun noe y everytime i feel jealous of her..i noe baby is loyal 2 me..juz insecure la..haix.. when i wif him see him sms her or other ppl i reali veri sad leh..like im so borin 2 b wif like tt..haix.. i noe im crazy la..but oh well..i need 2 get rid of dis foolish tinkin..!! i noe baby onli love me de. if not he wun change..his temper reali gone beta..ok la he still got short temper sometimes but den its ok la..i'll understand..hehe..cos i noe he's tryin 2 improve..he even goes 2 sch more le..lol.. 16times nv go sch nia..which is not bad le lo..last time ar i tink got till 50times le..lol..but den he like dun study de hor? sianx..hope he'll improve tt part oso..hehe..i love you..!! wahahaha tinkin of u my mood oso beta le..hehe...

read mayu's blog juz now..lol..she's happy in nihon (japan)..lol..glad for her wor.. hehe..oh n saw tt her sis-in-law is preg..!! lol..congrats on being a aunt soon..lol..miss ya girl.. muz buy goodie back for me hor..!! lol..kiddin..haha..juz enjoy urself is my pressie le..yeap..

hmm..saw a few ppl's blog..lol..realise their entries mostly all happy de leh..lol..glad they are happy wif life..for those hu are upset cheer up n rem.."no matter how complicated life is..it goes on.." reali envy those ppl hu's life is good sia..but oh well no pt envyin i noe.. lol..its ok..i believe life will get beta..!! lol..

2day had ica for costin..haix..gone case le nar..i totally dun noe how 2 do e journal entries..tink my figures wrong oso..oh well..its ok..suan le..over le..haha..next wk biz finance..omg..tt's worst i tink..haix..i totally im lost in e NPV chap nia..aiyo..lol..exam comin n biz finance is 1st paper..!! omg..sure die..dis sem gpa sure drop again..haix..oh well i have 2 give it my best le ba..muz start studyin..!! lol.. haven been maplin for a long time..dun tink will have tt much time ba..lol..see when got mood play ba..hmm..hope baby will pei me study..lol.. exm starts on 4th aug.. national day muz study sia..!! lol..oh well.. lata gotta go do tut for biz law n biz accting..lol..oh jap oso haven do..haix..mayb tml den do jap le ba..lol..yeap yeap. tml break gg gym..!! yay..!! lol..im gettin fatter..n its true..!! need 2 start not eatin lunch in sch le haix..where is my motivation 2 not eat sia..always say dun eat end up eating..haix..lol.. anyway will enjoy tml gym time..!! haha..muz perserver..cannot stop joggin wor..!! but sure stop de haix no stamina liao..lol..

i miss you so much..!! hope u are tinkin of me too.

thinking of you @ 6:34 PM

Sunday, July 09, 2006

ah ma yest came over my house 2 stay over..lol..but nth much 2 talk 2 her abt..but see her oso like veri sad n poor ting..but i tink she veri cute la..lol..

juz now dad wanna bring her go see doc ong for her leg..but she dun wan..den they 2 veri cute la..like dad is my ah ma's father ask her see doc den she dun wan..haha..den argue lo..lol..end up ah ma won..wahahahahaha..so cute..!! haha..

e purpose 2 askin her stay over is 2 separate her n ah gong la..if not they everyday fighting..aiyoyoyo..lol..they oso veri cute de la..everyting oso fight de..haha..of cos when there veri fan la..n 2 them not cute la..but 2 a person lookin at them..lol..tink veri cute lo heard dad say they since married everyday fighting le..cos they match make de? hmm..bt not bad la..end up they still 2gether..but so many yrs le..everyday fighting still can b 2gether not bad.. but can see ah ma oso do care for ah gong la..n vice versa..tt time ah gong nearly fall down ah ma oso caught him end up both of them fall down e escalator..haix..n is ah ma got e worst injuries..den ah gong sick le ah ma oso scared sia..see can tell she do care for him de..hope tings will work out for every1 soon..

2nite send her hm i sure sad again le..lol..but nvm next sat her bday tink they celebrating..lol..

thinking of you @ 1:59 PM

Thursday, July 06, 2006

haix..mama mon not gg work le..omg..!! tot wed he can come find me..but haix..now my transport so pain le nar..i cannot always go meet him at his place le leh..haix..i wan cry le la..!! like tt my hols he sure cannot come le..haix..den i dun noe how le nar..!! so fed up rite now..if hols dun meet den dun noe when can meet le nar..!!!!!!! cos 2nd sem tep everyday till 5 or 6 leh..haix.. i wan cry le..baby ar..tell me how how how?! have a talk wif them 2 let us meet? haix oso no use de..shit la..

like tt hols i go find work le..see if he free come work find me den send me hm.. wahaha..but haix..doubt can oso nar..omg..!! i wanna cry le nar..haix..y y y cant they let me meet him?!?!?!?!?! haix..it still amaze me tt we can last till so long..haix..his bday n my bday they beta let me go ar..!! if not i sure juz go liao..dun wan care le..tt time muz rem 2 take coins n money lol.. n dun bring hp..!! lol..if go hm they scold den no choice le..i veri rebel hor? lol..haix..but den my frdx n him sure tink like dis "you got e guts meh?" haix..ya lo..do i have e guts 2 rebel? haix..

till now im still tinkin if im e 1 hu is wrong to believe im right...

thinking of you @ 7:05 PM

Saturday, July 01, 2006

haix..im gettin moody again..!!

everytime i tink abt our prob, i get upset all over again..haix..i admit we are getting stronger..closer.. but our biggest obstacles is still my parents..haix..yyy?! everytime i read frd's blog abt their fun time wif bf..parents acceptin their parents blah blah.. i get sad..but i tink abt how he care for me i feel beta..but haix..e prob is still there nar.. haix..

y m i such a coward?! so timid?! sometimes he call me i scared 2 een ans..dun wanna see mum face n hear tt tone..haix..im gettin veri veri tired of hiding..i wanna just ask them if i can go out wif him..chat on fone wif him openly..!! but..haix..im trappin myself..not them im not givin myself e freedom..but how 2 get rid of tis fear? haix..i wanna cry le ar..~~!!!! im trap in a black hold..no matter how i find my way..i seem 2 b still in e dark..haix..

i need your hug 2 make me feel tt everyting is alright...

thinking of you @ 6:13 PM